


Crazy Days and Nights

by LovingGwendolaj



Category: Game of Thrones RPF
Genre: F/M, Gossip, Love, Romance, blind items, briame, celebrity gossip, gwendolaj - Freeform, past indiscretions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-20
Updated: 2020-01-28
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:02:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 13,609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22336723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LovingGwendolaj/pseuds/LovingGwendolaj
Summary: ** This work is RPFWell it seems our favorite friends have been showing up on the gossip blogs a lot lately. I’ve had several requests to write a fic about these “blind items” so here it is.This is a fun take on how Gwen and Nik have reacted to the recent blind items that are hitting way too close to home. Why have they kept their relationship a secret? And is it finally time to reveal the truth?
Relationships: Gwendoline Christie/Nikolaj Coster-Waldau
Comments: 162
Kudos: 99





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This one will only be a few chapters, but with yet another bit of gossip coming out today as well as several people asking me to write it, I couldn’t resist getting started.

Nikolaj was laying on the couch watching a random football game when the text from Gwen came through. _We made a gossip blog again. Have you seen it?_ Before he had a chance to reply it was followed by a photo, a screenshot, showing him exactly what she was talking about. 

Prior to reading the new one he reminisced on what had happened a few years ago. Back in 2016 there was gossip item about Gwen and him. Their relationship was and had always been private and secret, but somehow this gossip blogger had pretty much nailed it. The item read - **This beautiful actress is one of the stars of a very popular cable TV series. She is single.** (Gwendoline was quietly dating Giles at the time, so they had somehow missed that). **For the past couple of seasons she has become very close to one of the principal actors on the show. He is older than her. He is married.** (Obviously this was Nik and that part was spot on - they had become extremely close, emotionally and physically over that time period). **How close are they? It’s a full blown affair. And he has told friends that he is thinking of leaving his wife for her! This is definitely not a game.** (Again, this part was close. It was a full blown affair and he was thinking of leaving his wife for her but he hadn’t told anyone that - not at that point anyway, so it had to be a lucky guess unless someone else who knew the truth had spilled the beans). 

The four people involved - Him, Gwen, Giles and Nukaka - had met and discussed the gossip after it came out. They all swore they hadn’t told anyone else about it which meant as far as the rest of the world was concerned it was just gossip and nothing more. If anyone asked about it they would say just that and laugh it off. No one else need to know about the ruse they had created or why they had created it to begin with. 

Thankfully, nothing much had come of that little nugget on internet on some small, random gossip blog, but that was a time of change for his public relationship with Gwendoline. They became much more careful about touching, or hugging, or even kissing on the cheek in public. There were many pictures before that where one might read something more into the way they were holding one another or the looks that were captured. They had been photographed together in public many times too - having dinner after filming, taking some time off with cast members to go to the beach, hanging out before and after work events - and while nothing was confirmed publicly, Nik could look back at those photos objectively and understand why people might assume they were having an affair - which they technically were. 

They had talked time and time again about how they needed to be more careful. They had even made some changes in their public persona to try to stave off any more rumors. Gwen become more open about her relationship with Giles and started to refer to him as her partner and Nik and Nukaka made sure to post lots of happy family, happy couple things on their social media. Gwen seemed happy with Giles. He seemed happy with Nukaka - how would anyone assume that there was something going on between two people who appeared to be in happy, committed relationships? 

But now - there was this new gossip thing. It was from a site called Crazy Days and Nights run by someone who called themselves Enty Lawyer. Nik knew this site had a very good reputation for providing accurate gossip items. Whoever this guy was - he was good and he somehow had incredible knowledge and trustworthy sources. If his identity was ever revealed there would be a lot of A list celebs who would want his head - including many B list and C list too. 

The little blurb was short, but to the point: **The foreign born three named actor who was most recently seen on that long running pay cable show sleeps with his costar from that show as often as he can sneak away from his wife or when she is not in LA.** Nik felt his stomach lurch reading those words. They were perfectly on the nose - terrifyingly accurate. How did this man know the truth? Who told him? How had he found out? Was it once again just a lucky guess? He stood up and started to pace, feeling panic rising. 

There was another text from Gwen that came in while he was pacing. _You and your fucking three names._ Then another. _I don’t know if this is good or bad news, but people are guessing everyone from me, to Lena, to Carice to Sophie. And a few think it’s that Johnathan Rhys Meyers guy._

 _Sophie? What the fuck?_ What his first reply. How could anyone thing he would be sleeping with a 20 something kid who he had watched grow up? People are truly sick, he thought. 

_Really? That’s all you have to say right now?_ He could hear the annoyance in the text, so he picked up the phone and called her. “Hey, I’m sorry. Just trying to process this,” he apologized. “How the fuck did they figure us out?” 

Gwen sighed. “Well the good news is - there’s a lot of arguing about who it’s about. People aren’t convinced it’s us. So as long as it’s not revealed it might just fade away again like last time.” 

“Do the four of us need to get together again? Figure out some way to do some damage control?” he asked. 

“I’m not sure,” she replied. “I’m wondering if damage control right away might make us look even more suspicious, you know?” 

Nik nodded to himself. “Yeah I see your point. I just don’t know what to do,” he sighed. “My stomach is in complete knots. If this gets out -” His voice trailed off. 

“Nik stop,” she interrupted. “I know you have a lot more riding on this than I do - but you have to trust in all the work we have put into this. You also have to remember that none of this is our fault, okay?” 

“I know,” he replied with a long sigh. “I just don’t want it to all fall apart because of some gossip site. What about a bribe? We could offer him some cash to keep us off his site.” 

“Have you lost your fucking mind?” she snapped. “So when he says no and then posts about it anyway we can end up in jail for bribery. Nope. No way.” Nik swallowed hard. “Listen,” her voice softened and turned into that sweet, calm, melodic tone he loved so much. “We’re going to be in LA in a couple of days. I miss you. We haven’t had more than a few hours here and there together for a long time. We need this. It will all be fine when we’re together - you know it always is.” 

Nik did know that. No matter what kind of craziness was going on in the world or in his life it always felt better when he was in her arms, feeling her skin on his or the tickle of her breath on his cheek. Her smile alone could make everything okay again. “You’re right. It will probably all just fade away again like last time and I’ll feel like a fool for worrying so much.” 

“Okay, so we agree - we ignore it and do nothing, right?” she asked for confirmation. 

“I’ll show Nukaka so she knows and you show Giles, but yeah - we’ll just let it go and hope for the best,” he agreed. 

“Great,” she replied. “I should go, but Nik - I love you,” Gwen added softly. 

He looked around to make sure no one had come home and then he replied, “I love you too.” When they hung up he felt very alone. She was right - they just needed to be together. He’d just been in London and they had a quick lunch, but they didn’t have time for anything else, which made it even more difficult. It was so painful to be around her and not be able to do all the things that felt so natural when they were alone. 

Usually when he was feeling this kind of anger and frustration he would go to the gym and work out until he felt better, but he had some work he needed to do for the new production company and he had to get shit ready to head to Los Angeles. It was really hard to focus though because something Gwen said kept coming back to him “none of this is our fault.” 

The way he had chose to handle a situation many years ago had snowballed into this massive ruse that was affecting him and his family, but also Gwen too and Giles. Nik was so thankful she had Giles. He was an incredible man and he truly loved Gwen. He treated her well and supported her when Nik couldn’t be there to do it himself. He would never be able to repay the man for everything he had done and everything he had sacrificed when the day finally came that this whole thing would be over. 

And when will that day be? Nik asked himself. Will the time ever be right? Maybe the time is right now? He thought. Maybe all this gossip shit is a sign that it’s finally time to tell their families the truth? Are we all just a bunch of idiots? He wondered. He’d had this very same conversation with himself a million times over the years, but for some reason - this time - it felt different. He threw himself into his work, but he couldn’t ignore the nagging feeling that the time was now.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to devote a full chapter to the backstory of this fic because I wanted to try to make people understand the choice that was made and why. You guys know that I like to be creative and find ways to have them not cheat, so I might have went a little unrealistic with this one. But if you really think about these blinds and believe they might be true it just doesn’t add up with the happy family we see. I wanted to explain that and paint Nik and Nukaka as two parents who would sacrifice everything for their kids. It’s not uncommon for people to stay married for their children, but the rest might be a stretch. So please remember it’s fiction and it’s fun and I just really wanted to find a way to keep cheating off the table for my own peace of mind. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy and are able to “buy” the backstory. Love you guys so much! I’ll try to reply to all the comments later.

It all started one night because Nik was trying to make love to his wife. It had been almost a month since they had been together and all he did was try to initiate something - that’s when the biggest fight of their marriage began - the one that would eventually end life as they knew it. They had slept side by side for days and then weeks - and nothing. Nik tried, but she was always too tired or not feeling well or just not in the mood. He respected that for as long as he could, but finally, that night - it all blew up. 

He never wanted to be that guy that begged or coerced a woman into having sex with him, but this wasn’t just any woman - it was his wife. She had been avoiding it for close to a month and that wasn’t normal. Their sex life had always been fine, or so he thought. It wasn’t until much later when things progressed to the next level with Gwendoline that he realized how much passion and desire they had been lacking all along. He thought having sex once a week, maybe a bit more, maybe a bit less, was normal and in the grand scheme of things for married couples it probably was. But the amount of time in between kept getting longer and longer and looking back he realized the quality of their lovemaking had changed too. 

The morning after their huge fight Nik was about to apologize for getting so angry, but before he could Nukaka announced she was going to spend some time in Greenland with her family - she said she wasn’t sure how long. They fought again and she told him that she needed a break from him for a while. Nik walked out of the house to go for a jog and by the time he was back she was gone. The next week he left to start filming season 3 of Game of Thrones, knowing it would be well over a month before they saw each other again, unless she came to visit him, which he knew would never happen. 

A couple days later she called and they made plans for girls - where they would stay, when they would visit him, when they would visit her and when they would all be back together as a family. There was some strain, but strangely it felt as if the fight had never happened and they were just planning around their busy schedules. Nik was confused, but honestly - he was more relieved. He wanted to focus on his work, but more importantly his girls were his whole world and he couldn’t put them through anything that would cause them pain. He was their dad - their protector and he couldn’t hurt them. 

While filming season 3 he really got to know Gwendoline and he instantly fell in love with her charm and personality. They hit it off right away, but in a very strange way that only the two of them understood and appreciated. To others it would have appeared they hated each other, but the joy they got out of bantering and jesting and teasing was amazing. She kept him upbeat and happy while he was missing his girls tremendously. 

When it was finally time for him to head home he was excited to see Safina and Filippa and he was looking forward to spending family time with them and Nukaka. When he got home that day they were waiting and it felt just like it always had. They hugged, they laughed, they talked - it was a perfect little family. But once the girls were tucked into bed - everything changed. 

Nik could remember being nervous that night. Normally he would have taken Nukaka in his arms and one thing would lead to another until they were making love like the happily married couple he thought they were. But as soon as he came into the bedroom he could feel the tension and he knew it would never be the same between them again. “Sit down, we need to talk,” she said softy. 

What happened in the next 30 minutes forever changed their marriage and his future. Nukaka tearfully explained to him that she realized a few months earlier that she was assexual. She had no libido, no sexual desire and got no enjoyment from sexual activity. It was a lot for him to take in and as hard as he tried he couldn’t understand the concept. He was sure she had enjoyed it in the past, but she explained that she had just been trying to do what a wife should do and make him happy, but she couldn’t fight her true feelings any longer. 

Another startling admission came when Nik started to wonder if it was just him that was the problem and maybe she wasn’t attracted to him in that way. While she was in Greenland she hooked up with an old friend. “I swear it was nothing more than an experiment,” she explained through tears. Nukaka went on to tell him that she wanted to know if it was him or just sex in general that she wasn’t interested in. She said that she didn’t even let the man finish before she knew it was her that was the issue. 

They stayed up half the night talking. Shockingly, Nik wasn’t even mad about the infidelity. If he was completely honest he was actually glad she had done it because he knew the end purpose was an attempt to fix their relationship not destroy it. Also, it was actually a relief to know he wasn’t the problem. He’d always considered himself a thorough and generous lover. He knew how to treat a woman and he was pretty sure he knew what women liked - clearly he hadn’t known what his own wife wanted though - which was nothing. 

He respectfully listened to her explain what it was like to be assexual and what it meant for relationships - and what it meant for the two of them. By the end she was giving him an out, even though she still loved him and wanted their family to stay together. Around 3am that morning Nik had come to 4 conclusions:  
A. He still loved his wife. He couldn’t just shut that off. He knew their relationship wouldn’t be the same but he couldn’t imagine his life without her in it in some manner  
B. He couldn’t be in a sexless marriage.  
C. His kids were the only thing that mattered in this whole mess and he couldn’t hurt them. He wanted to give them the life he’d imagined for them and the family they deserved. Nukaka agreed on this one, but she was leaving the ball in his court.  
D. He missed Gwen. 

Nik had no idea why he was thinking about Gwendoline at the most critical time in his life and marriage, but only a day after they had gone their separate ways his heart was aching when he thought of her. Perhaps he missed the way she made him feel light and happy and he was longing for that feeling during a very dark time. It wasn’t until months later that Nik realized he had probably already fallen in love with Gwen before that faithful night. 

Nik had two full weeks at home before he had to go back to filming. It was the most bizarre fortnight of his life, but reflecting back on it - he hadn’t know then that those first two weeks were a taste of what the next decade of his life would be. During the day they played the perfect family and were model parents. They made sure the girls were happy and taken care of and most importantly love - by two parents under one roof. In the evenings they lost a lot of sleep staying up late to discuss and debate their future. 

What it always seemed to come back to was that neither one of them wanted to change things for the girls. Staying together wasn’t much of a sacrifice for Nukaka. Sex was off the table, so it wasn’t like she needed to get it elsewhere since she didn’t want it anyway. Nik could still provide all her other emotional needs. The comradery, the confidant, the protector, the deep, trusting friendship - it was all she needed. But it wasn’t all he needed and that was the dead end road they kept coming to. 

On the fourth night of debating Nukaka came up with an absolutely ridiculous suggestion that he’d turned down immediately. “What if we pretend?” she said. “What if we do exactly what we’ve been doing until the girls are both adults and then we decide then if we want to tell them the truth or just “break up” for real then?” 

“That’s ridiculous,” Nik said, shaking his head. “How would that even work? Like a discrete open marriage?” 

“Sort of,” she replied. “I wouldn’t expect any marriage commitments from you. You would be free to see whoever you wanted, fall in love with whoever you wanted - but it would all have to be kept completely quiet.”

“That’s absurd,” Nik said. And they moved on. Round and round they went until two days before he had to go back to work she suggested the same thing again. “You want to turn our family into a live action play? Where we are actors?” The idea was still ridiculous but for some reason he was giving it much more consideration than he did the first time. “What if I do meet someone else and fall in love? How could I ask or expect them to live their lives this way? How could I ask them to keep our relationship a secret for potentially years?” She didn’t have an answer to that other than suggesting he explain it as an open marriage to whoever he was interested in. 

The other option was that they come clean and just split up. It would break the girls hearts, but they would get over it eventually. Nik knew that lots of kids had amazing lives with divorced parents. He knew objectively and logically that it was the best option. But his heart just wouldn’t allow it. He had no other prospects - so what would it hurt to just play happy family and throw himself into his work? 

So that was how it began. Nik hadn’t committed to waiting until the girls were adults, not at first anyway, but he agreed to keep it all a secret and carry on for the time being. As time passed though, it just became routine. It was easy. Everyone was happy. Everything was perfect - except for his nonexistent sex life. 

It only took him two months before he spilled the entire cherade to Gwendoline one night after filming. They were winding down with a couple of drinks at his rental place and it all came out - right from the beginning. Maybe it was wrong to tell her or anyone his deepest family secrets, but once he let it out it felt really good. 

She sat there and listened, patiently and intently. She encouraged him when he needed it, she consoled him when he broke down and most of all - not one did she show him even an ounce of pity. She understood. She told him he was doing the right thing and it didn’t matter what anyone else though - him and his family were the only ones that mattered. She made him feel like he was truly an amazing father and a good man. And he knew it was absolutely genuine coming from her. Gwen always told it like it was. 

When he had told her the whole story and she had made him feel like everything was going to be okay, she got up and she left, but not before placing a tender, lingering kiss on his lips. That was the night his world shifted again. That was the night things started to change, because that was the moment he knew for sure that he was falling in love with Gwendoline. 

Now all these years later - years and years of playing a role - things felt like they might be coming undone. Gwen had tried to reassure him, but this nagging feeling in the pit of his stomach wouldn’t leave him. Nik was heading to LA. He was finally going to spend some much needed time with the love of his life. But he couldn’t help but wonder if he had treated Gwen like a dirty little secret for all this time? She deserved better. She deserved more. He sighed and pounded his fist against the table in frustration. He would get to LA and Gwen would make it all better like she always did. That woman was his saving grace, his touchstone, his soulmate - and he would never have survived a day of this charade without her. But maybe - maybe it was time for things to change…


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time for a little smut break ☺️

Nik knew that Gwen would already be there when he got to his home in LA. She had her own key and she texted earlier asking if she could have a shower and wait there for him. It felt like everything at the airport was moving at sloth speed and he really had to find his inner zen to avoid snapping at people. He turned down every selfie request and rushed away so he didn’t have to see the disappointed faces. He knew he was being an ass, but if he said yes to one he would feel like he had to say yes to the next and he would end up spending an extra hour at LAX that he could be spending with Gwen. 

When he got to the house he went in, dropped everything by the door and went looking for her. He found her on the couch in a robe, her hair still damp from the shower. “You have to see this,” she said, holding up her phone. “I did some research and there are more.” 

Nik walked over and took the phone out of her hand. Instead of looking at what she was trying to show him he turned off the screen and set it down. “Not right now,” he said, shaking his head. He smiled down at her and offered a hand. Gwen took it, smiling back seductively. “I’ve needed this for way too long,” he sighed, pulling her to her feet. He had to direct his gaze upwards, just slightly, when she was standing. With their eyes locked he reached for the tie on her robe and tugged it. 

When the robe fell open, revealing nothing but her creamy white skin he shivered with pleasure. Nik slipped his hands inside over her shoulders and shoved the robe right off. It dropped to the floor, leaving her standing before him fully nude. With a feral growl he pulled her against him and found her mouth. Passion exploded between them the second their lips touched. His fingers trailed over her back and then down to her ass. He splayed his hands over both cheeks and squeezed lightly. Gwen moaned into his mouth and he drank it up. He loved the way her rump seemed to fit perfectly into his hands. Everything about holding her was perfect - like she was made for him. It was even more apparent every time he slipped inside her - it was like putting in the last piece of the jigsaw puzzle - satisfying in so many ways. 

That would come eventually, but for the time being he was content to just kiss her, and enjoy how good it felt to hold her. It was truly therapeutic. Everything he’d been thinking about that had been weighing him down was gone from his mind as she filled him with light and joy.

He took a quick break to remove his shirt so he could feel even more of her skin on his. When Nik drew her back in her breasts brushed against his chest and he shivered again. This woman could completely undo him. She could drop him to his knees with a look if she wanted to and she knew it. She could also make him feel like he could fly, soar - so light and free. 

When he felt her hand grab the front of his pants, her fingers slipping just inside the waistband, he knew it was time to kick things up a notch. When they were in bed and she was feeling frisky one of the ways she would let him know was that she would gently touch his tummy, just below his belly button. It was so erotic the way she just lightly tickled the area - he would end up hard in no time, even though she never actually touched his groin.

He was already hard just from kissing her and touching her though. He was ready to fuck, but he really wanted to savor and enjoy her this first time. It had been way too long and he wanted to fully enjoy every second. If that was going to happen he needed to maintain control and he couldn’t do that with her roaming fingers. 

Nik took her hand and led her to his bedroom. As he caught a glimpse of himself in the huge full length mirror he had an idea. He stopped and stood her beside it and then pulled the comforter off the bed and laid it on the floor in front of the mirror. Gwen was looking at him with intrigue, but once she realized his plan he saw her eyes darken with desire as she took a deep breath. 

He laid her down so the mirror was visible and then quickly stripped off the rest of his clothes. Nik moved to the side so he wasn’t blocking her view and then pushed her knees apart gently, spreading her legs. Some women might have been shy about looking and watching, but Gwen wasn’t one of those women. She clearly enjoyed every second of it and it heightened her arousal to new peaks. 

He started with a simple touch, just a graze of the fingertip over her skin and Gwen moaned. “This is so surreal,” she whispered, her eyes fixated on the mirror. “I’ve never seen - “ she paused. “Everything,” she finished. Nik realized that he really couldn’t fully appreciate how different this was for her. When he spread her legs and made love to her he always had a full view of the action, but she didn’t. 

Nik used his hands to spread her folds and expose the darker, moist skin underneath. She gasped softly and squirmed a bit. He wanted to get his face in there and taste her, but he didn’t want to block her view so he continued with his hands instead. He held her open with one hand and started to gently explore with the other, rubbing her softly, but avoiding penetration at first. Gwen squirmed again and he heard her pant. This was really turning her on, hard and fast. 

He trailed his middle finger slowly down to her opening and then flipped over his hand and casually slipped his finger up inside her. As soon as he felt her slippery lubrication his cock started to throb in jealousy and he had to take a breath to calm himself. He felt almost dizzy with desire but he couldn’t lose focus. 

Nik pushed his finger deep and then drew it back out, moving it right to his mouth. He had to taste her somehow, so he sucked her juices off his finger and groaned as her flavor flooded his taste buds. It only made him crave her more, but he found the willpower to continue and moved his hand back into position, filling her with two fingers this time. He started slow, pushing as deep as his hand would allow before pulling all the way out so he could penetrate her again. 

He saw her struggling to keep her eyes open, but her desire to watch won over and she focused again. Nik continued to pleasure her, curving his fingers upwards when he was deep inside her, hitting that slightly rough spot that made her moan every time. “That feels so good,” she sighed. He watched her bite her lip and again his dick responded with wild abandon. I need to fuck her, he thought, feeling desperate, wondering how he could possibly hold off any longer. 

He got his answer when he looked at her face. Her eyes were shining, slightly wet, because she was so turned on. Nik started to move a little faster and her face twisted to that look of pure bliss. Gwen gasped and lifted her hips to meet the thrust of his hand. “Fuck,” she hissed. “I - oh - god - I’m close.” Her face was filled with shock at how quickly she had been pushed to the edge. “Fuck me,” she begged, clawing at him desperately. “Please Nik, fuck me. I don’t want to come until you’re inside me.” 

She didn’t have to ask him twice. In a matter of seconds he had his dick right where his fingers had been and it was absolute heaven. With only three deep thrusts she exploded with a loud, but strangled cry. There was nothing, absolutely nothing, that compared to having a woman come while buried deep inside her. Feeling her body writhe and squirm, sensing the increased moisture, and those deep, pulsing contractions - it was all breathtaking. 

Nik was somehow able to hold back his own orgasm for a respectable amount of time before he finally came just as hard and loudly as she had. He hadn’t known how powerful an orgasm could be until the first time he’d fucked Gwen. He decided it was probably magnified by just how deeply he loved and desired her - or perhaps there really is one person out there for each of us and when you find the one it just makes everything better. 

They laid together on the floor in front of the mirror for a while. Nik was lazily trailing his fingers up and down the curve of her hip, while checking out her ass in the mirror and he got busted. “You’re looking at my ass in the reflection, aren’t you?” Gwen said with a smile. He shrugged and nodded, then gave her rump a playful slap. She giggled and then leaned over and kissed him. It felt so amazing when they could act this way with each other without having to worry about someone seeing them. 

The times were too infrequent for his liking though. She had tried to make it better by convincing him of the whole distance makes the heart grow fonder thing, but he was quite certain he would never get tired of any amount of time he got to spend with her. 

“Come on, get dressed,” she said. “I can’t have you wandering around half naked distracting me while I try to show you what I found.” 

“Ughhhhh,” Nik groaned. “You’re being such a buzz kill,” he whined. 

“I’ll make it up to you later, you might need it after I show you how much this Enty guy loves you,” she replied, grimacing. 

“Oh fuck, is it that bad?” Nik asked, getting up to start putting his clothes back on. Gwen grabbed a shirt and pants from his drawer for herself and they both went out to the living room where her phone was. 

“It’s not that bad,” she said finally. “It’s just we missed at least one that I know of, though I did see your name come up a lot in the comments of other gossip items - seems you’ve gained a bit of a reputation,” she said, clearly trying not to smile. “Here, look - this one is from September, just after the Emmy’s.” 

Nik took the phone from her and read the blind item dated September 23rd out loud, “At a pre-Emmy award party, this foreign born A- list nominated/winning actor made it plain for the world to see that wished his actress wife had stayed home so he could bask in the spotlight and hit on women.” He gave Gwen a look and handed back the phone. “That doesn’t sound like me at all. He didn’t use the three name thing and he called me A- instead of adding in the B+ and besides, I wasn’t hitting on anyone and I made sure to pay attention to Nukaka.”

Gwen raised her eyebrows. “Need I remind you of the fact that you turned to me when we won before kissing your wife? And all those pictures where you stared at me with those puppy dog eyes?” Nik pouted. “Oh so now he thinks I’m an adulterer and a fucking man whore too?” 

She shrugged. “Maybe he hadn’t put it all together yet. Maybe this one was just a stab in the dark?” 

“Or maybe it’s not even about me,” he snapped, scowling. 

“Oh stop being so moody. It might not be fully accurate but it’s about you. I just wanted you to know there were more - out there, that’s all,” she snapped back. 

Nik sighed, “I’m sorry.” He reached for her hand. “This whole thing has been causing me a lot more stress lately and I was freaking out a bit back home.” 

Gwen squeezed his hand. “You know what? I shouldn’t have showed you that one. Let’s just forget about it and enjoy the time we have together, okay?” 

Nik nodded. “How about we go out and hit that coffee spot you love?” 

She eyed him. “You want to make a public appearance together with that latest gossip that just came out?” 

“As far as anyone else knows the two of us are friends. We’re both in LA - we’ve been spotted here - so it only makes sense that we would meet up for coffee or dinner, right?” He shrugged. “Maybe it would make it seem less like we’re hanging out in private or hiding something if we just casually have a coffee. And maybe it will make this guy think that we don’t care about the gossip because we have no reason to care, right?” 

Finally Gwen smiled and shrugged too. “You’re right. We can’t let this control us - and I’m dying for a coffee anyway. I’ll be ready in 2 minutes.” 

The nagging feeling in his stomach had almost completely disappeared. He knew after a little more time with her it would be gone completely. He wanted to make the most of their time because she had the Critic’s Choice awards coming up and he had a trip to New Mexico the following week. When Gwen was ready they got in his car and headed off to have that coffee - and he didn’t think twice about the huge mistake they were making.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there were photos on Getty if Nik at a cafe in LA but we couldn’t see who was with him. Then a blind came out a couple days later saying he was spotted out with Gwen. It’s not certain if those are connected, but I thought it would be fun to connect them and explain why she wasn’t photographed ☺️ 
> 
> I also need to do a bit of back story on how Giles fits into the equation so I’m thinking a Gwen POV next chapter? Or should I keep the whole thing Nik’s POV? 
> 
> Thanks so much for reading ❤️❤️

“I guess you were right,” Gwen said, as they were driving back to his place after a lovely coffee and snack on the outdoor patio. It had been really nice to be out with her and it had also been amazing because not one person bothered them for a selfie. They were small fish in L.A. - Everyone was looking for Brad, Leo and the Jennifers. 

Nik checked the rear view mirror for the hundredth time and his heart sank. “I think you spoke too soon,” he muttered. 

“What? What’s wrong?” Gwen asked. 

“I think we are being followed,” Nik announced, switching lanes quickly. He made two fast turns and when the car continued to follow he was certain. “Fuck,” he said, slamming his hand on the steering wheel. 

“Can you lose him?” She suggested, looking back towards the black sedan. 

“Nope,” He replied, slamming on the breaks. “I’m going to see what the fuck this asshole wants.” He was vibrating with anger. Everything had been perfect. The day has been beautiful and now this dick was ruining it all. 

Gwen grabbed his wrist to try to stop him. “Nik, come on. This is crazy. What if he has a gun or something?” 

“It’s fine. I’ll be careful,” he assured her as he pulled away and got out. He was too angry and riled up and he knew he needed to calm down, but it only got worse as he strode purposefully towards the car. 

The man had already rolled down the window when Nik arrived. “What the fuck do you want?” he snarled. 

“I have some photos here that I thought you might be interested in purchasing,” the slimeball replied. Nik felt his stomach sink as he watched the man start to flip through the photos in the viewfinder of his expensive camera. Fucking paparazzi. It was plain as day the way he was staring at Gwen in those photos that he was madly in love with her. Fuck. She teased him about that look all the time and he tried to control it but this time it was worse than ever. “20 grand,” the man said as he finished flicking through the photos. 

“20,000 dollars? That’s absurd,” Nik snapped. He didn’t want to pay this fucker anything. He wanted to reach in and strangle him, then take his camera and smash it, but he knew he couldn’t do that. “I’ll give you $5,000 and you hand over the memory card right now.” 

“No can do,” the man said, shaking his head. “I have photos of Bieber on here.” He thought for a moment. “You e-transfer me $10,000 right now and you can watch me delete all the pics with the two of you in them. But I get to keep the ones of just you.” 

“Fuck,” Nik growled, clenching his jaw and his fists. Part of him wanted to just say fuck it and let the man post them all but that damn look on his face was too much. This was his fault and he needed to fix it. “Fine, what’s your email?” The man gave it and he logged onto his online banking. He set everything up but didn’t hit confirm. “You delete them all and then I’ll send the money.” Nik watched as he deleted over 20 photos and showed him the ones he was keeping that had Gwen completely hidden from view. “Fine. And you swear you have no copies? If anything comes out I’ll go to the cops with your email and plate number.” 

“Nope, they’re all gone, I promise,” the pap said, flipping through again to show Nik what came before and after the photos of just him. 

“If I ever see your face again this won’t go as well for you,” Nik threatened. 

“Pleasure doing business with you,” the man said. Nik once again resisted the urge to strangle him and turned to walk back to his own vehicle.

“What the hell just happened?” Gwen asked, still looking panicked. “Are you okay? What’s going on?” 

Nik explained the situation as he started to drive away. “I’m so sorry,” he finished. “I really didn’t think it was going to be a huge deal - just a few minutes out together.” 

“How can you not control that look when we’re in public?” Gwen said with a sigh. She had a little smile on her lips though, and he knew the fact he couldn’t hide his feelings for her was flattering and deep down she loved it. 

“I try, but sometimes it slips. You say something funny, or you smile or you laugh and I just break scene,” Nik said softly. He reached over and took her hand with his other on the wheel. “I blame you,” he said softly, stroking her palm with his thumb. She teased him the rest of the way home, but by the time they were in the house they forgot all about what had happened and were completely lost in each other yet again. 

They made love like a couple of newlyweds and when it was time for her to leave Sunday morning Nik felt his heart aching when they said goodbye. He would see her again in a couple of days, but she had a big night at the Critic’s Choice Awards that she needed to get ready for and poor Giles was probably missing her too. “I wish you could be there with me tonight,” she said sadly, after they kissed goodbye. 

“Me too,” Nik replied, stroking her face with his fingertips. The cast had decided that most of them would prefer to go to the SAG awards because they could bring a plus one to that event, so it would have been Nik all alone with Gwen and Giles, which would have looked totally awkward. He hated not being there for her when she was nominated, but they both agreed it was best. “Good luck - you deserve to win this,” he said, honestly. “What are you wearing?” he asked, wondering if he was going to be missing some sexy, low cut dress among everything else. 

“I’ll send you a pic when I’m all ready,” she replied with a smile. “And thank you,” Gwen added, kissing him one more time. “Love you,” she replied, before leaving with a wave. 

“Love you too,” he replied, watching her walk away as his heart started to hurt even worse. It was getting harder each time they parted it seemed. At first he was able to just look forward to the next time they would be together and it didn’t hurt at all. Then this deep ache started to appear and it only got stronger up to the moment she would leave and then took hours to disappear completely. The pain was becoming physical now and could almost take his breath away sometimes. 

He kept himself busy most of the day and in the early afternoon he got a text from Gwen with a photo. He opened it and smiled. She was wearing a Dior men’s suit and she looked incredible. Her makeup was beautiful and her hair looked amazing. Nik replied, _Never seen a Dior suit look so sexy. Have fun Beautiful._ He watched the broadcast and was extremely disappointed when she didn’t win. He knew she wasn’t expecting it, but even when you were absolutely sure you wouldn’t win it was still disappointing. He wished he could have been there to subtly console her. 

Sadly, he had to wait until late the next evening before he could console her in person. She was out late and slept in and then had a late lunch with Giles before she came back to his place. Barely 36 hours apart and he was so happy to see her he actually ran to the door. She was standing there with her big designer sunglasses on her face, an expensive, fancy bag on one arm and her cell phone in her hand - looking every bit the huge personality she was. She waved the phone at him. “There have been developments,” she said, pulling off the glasses to reveal the concerned look on her face. 

“Oh for fuck sake, now what?” Nik asked, stepping aside so she could enter. 

“Well it seems our paparazzi friend did sell those pictures of you to Getty - which is fine - its just you. But either we were spotted by someone else or that gossip blog just made another lucky guess.” She handed him her phone and he read the latest addition out loud. “This married foreign born three named A-/B+ mostly television actor has taken his affair with his foreign born former co-star from London to Los Angeles. The pair were spotted together in LA this weekend.” Nik grumbled and handed the phone back. “Why is he so fascinated by us right now? Business slow with the more important people?” 

“I don’t know,” Gwen said somberly. “But I guess we are going to have to be more careful from now on. Just lay low I guess and hope it blows over.” 

Nik thought for a moment as they got comfortable on the couch. “Maybe you should go out to dinner with Giles in a high traffic area - somewhere you’re sure to be spotted. Or take a selfie with a fan or something - make sure they see the two of you together. Perhaps they need a reminder that we’re in relationships and since Nukaka isn’t here I can’t be the one who does it,” Nik suggested. 

“I guess we could try. Can’t make it worse, right?” she replied with a shrug. “I’ll call him tomorrow and we will go for dinner at my favorite sushi place. There are fans and paps crawling around there all the time - surely someone will get the word out there.” 

They talked a little longer and agreed this was the right thing to do next. Then Gwen laid her head on his chest and she became the only thing in the world that mattered right then. As Nik stroked her hair and enjoyed the feel of her weight pressing comfortably on him, he reminded himself again of just how far they had come with this ruse - and how close they were to the finish line. They just had to get past this bump in the road and then fly below the radar again. Surely someone else would come along and steal the spotlight soon. Nik was fully convinced that was the last they would be on the gossip blog for the foreseeable future. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am floored by how many of you are reading this ☺️☺️☺️ I’m getting towards the end now though. Probably one to two more chapters - unless there are any new developments I need to cover in the mean time. 😝
> 
> Thank you all for taking this journey with me. It so nice to have this community of likeminded individuals to share this ride with. 🥰🥰🥰

When Gwen and Giles got back to the hotel they were staying at - the Chateau Marmont, a very luxurious, upscale Los Angeles hotel that is well known for its ability to protect the privacy of its guests, she was feeling pretty good about the dinner appearance. She was actually pretty sure they had even been followed back to the hotel - so those fucking paps would know she was there with Giles. They had decided to wait until Thursday night as it was a bit busier, just to ensure the best chance of being spotted and photographed - which seemed to have worked out well for them. 

Nik had left for New Mexico the day before so Gwen had stayed with him until he went and then her and Giles had enjoyed some time relaxing together before their big outing. She had been so focussed on spending time with Nik that she had totally neglected Giles pretty much since they got to LA, except for their fun night at the Critics Choice awards. Giles didn’t mind though - he was ridiculously supportive of her, Nik and the whole scheme they’d had going for years. Being with her in the limelight had really given him a chance to make connections and network with celebs and fashion icons that he may never have got the chance to meet. 

Several years ago when her and Nikolaj first started their relationship she had approached Giles with the idea of him acting as her cover and he was on board right away. It had genuinely surprised her just how willing he was to put aside his own life and future relationships to help her out, but he really was an amazing man who cared about her and loved her deeply. They were very close friends and they shared all their secrets and stories with each other. Long before Nikolaj even brought up the whole plan she had already told Giles she was in love with Nik. 

Thinking back on those early days was very bittersweet. It hadn’t been easy, at least not at first. She was concerned about every aspect of the plan and it took a long time before she finally agreed to it. It was after a particularly lengthy amount of time apart from Nik and the depression and sadness she was battling because of it. She finally decided that any anxiety she had about the rest, didn’t measure up to how much she was hurting being away from him. 

Neither one of them had truly anticipated it would carry on as long as it had. But with Giles and Nukaka fully on board and Nik determined to protect his girls - it all just worked. They had time apart, sometimes long stretches, but it only made her look even more forward to the time they had together. And in those long stretches apart she had Giles who was there to support her and make her laugh, but best of all - he gave her an empathetic ear - he knew the whole story and he both accepted and understood her feelings. 

“How did I get so lucky?” she asked, gazing fondly at Giles. She walked over and placed a kiss on his cheek. “Thank you, yet again, for tonight and this whole trip - everything.” 

“You know you don’t have to thank me,” he scoffed. “One trip with you to LA and I have orders for two custom dresses and three more that seemed very interested. And -” he paused and smiled. “I may have hooked up with a rather well known actor the other night.” 

“Are you serious?” Gwen squealed. “Who was it? Tell me.” 

“Oh no, a gay man never kisses and tells about the straight man who took him to bed,” Giles chuckled. “But get me drunk one night when we’re back home in London and I might be persuaded to drop his initials or something.” Gwen laughed. She knew he would tell her eventually. This was how it always seemed to go lately. Giles was getting good at finding the right sort of man to have his trysts with and it was all related to the fact that he was presenting himself as an unavailable straight (well, Bi at least) man. These guys he was with didn’t want anyone to know they’re into men so there is no concern about any of them blowing Giles’ cover either. She knew that Giles found the whole thing exciting and it was yet another reason this cover worked for him too - both his personal and professional life were flourishing with the help of Gwen’s success and being on a hugely popular HBO series. 

“So I think that went well,” Gwen said as she took off her coat and hung it up. 

Giles nodded. “There were definitely photographers getting shots of us - so as long as those photos come out I would say it’s mission accomplished.” He sat down and glanced over at her. “If you’re really sure that’s what you wanted?” he added. 

“Do you think it was the wrong thing to do?” Gwen asked, feeling her stomach gurgle with anxiety. “Why didn’t you say so before we went and did it?” 

Giles shrugged. “I’m honestly not sure what’s right and wrong anymore. This gossip thing is getting out of hand and I don’t know if we’re putting out the fire or stoking it.” He eyed her and then spoke gravely, “You know what fans are like. People love the idea of you and Nikolaj together and they are going to run with it, further and further, the more that comes out.” 

“Where are you going with this?” she asked. She could tell he had an endpoint, but he was taking too long to get there for her liking. 

“Filippa and Safina are teenagers. They are on social media - how long do you think it’s going to be before one of them sees something?” he asked. “Didn’t you tell me once before that a fan had sent Safina a message on instagram about her dad and Lena having an affair?” Gwen nodded and felt her stomach churn even more. “You don’t want them to find out this way,” Giles said softly. “We’ve been at this for years and years to protect them. If it’s going to come out - don’t you think they deserve to hear it from the people who love them?” 

Gwen sank into a chair with a long sigh. “That’s not my decision to make.” She met his eyes and she could see the concern he felt for her. “Okay,” she said finally. “I really want to enjoy this weekend with Nik and the rest of the cast at the SAGs but once it’s over I’ll talk to him. Maybe Nukaka too and see what they think.” The concern had always been about the girls finding out and none of them wanted to watch everything come undone after they had worked so hard to control it. She honestly wasn’t sure how Nik would react when she talked to him, but she knew Giles was right and the conversation was necessary. 

When Gwen woke the next morning she saw photos of her and Giles on Instagram and she knew the event had been successful. As an added touch she made an instagram story with a photo of these absolutely adorable Funko dolls of her and Giles in their Emmy awards outfits that a talented fan had made. The more attention on her and Giles and reminders that they were a couple the better. She made sure to show Giles the photo when he got up and they gushed about how precious they were over a delicious room service breakfast. 

When Giles headed for the shower she called Nikolaj. She wasn’t sure what he had planned for that day, other than an appearance at George Martin’s theatre that evening. He would be at a convention all day Saturday but come Saturday night she would be waiting at his house for him to return so they could spend a night alone before meeting up with all their friends at the SAG awards the next day. 

“Been on instagram yet today?” she asked, when he answered the phone.

“No, what’s up?” he replied. 

“There are photos of Giles and I at the sushi place last night - it worked. We did it,” she said proudly. Even with the conversation she’d had with Giles the night before in the back of her mind she was certain this couldn’t hurt things and she was sure it would take some attention away from her and Nik. 

“That’s incredible, but I knew you would figure it out,” he complimented her. “Was Giles okay with everything?” Nik and Giles had grown close over the years and Gwen could detect the genuine concern. 

“Yes, he was fine,” she assured him. “He’s been amazing.” 

“We couldn’t do this without him,” Nik admitted truthfully. 

They talked a little longer about their plans for the day. “I wish I was with you,” Gwen admitted. “I’ve never really spent much time in New Mexico. I bet it’s beautiful.” 

“It would be perfect - if you were here,” he said softly. “I’m really missing you right now and I don’t know why. I mean, more than usual,” Nik added, clearly worried about how his original statement had sounded. “I always miss you - I’m just finding it’s been worse lately.” 

“Me too,” Gwen agreed. She had been feeling exactly the same way. It just seemed harder to part and she felt more desperate to be together again than she usually did. “Maybe it’s just all this added drama the last little while,” she suggested. That pang of anxiety started in her stomach again, thinking about the conversation she would have to initiate after they recovered from the SAG awards. 

“Yeah, that could be,” he replied, his voice drifting off as if he was still uncertain. 

“Listen, I want you to have fun tonight and tomorrow, okay?” Gwen said sternly. “Give the fans a great time. They pay a lot to be at these things and they’re all so desperate for their moment with you.” 

“I know, I know,” he sighed. “I normally love these conventions, but I’m starting to see more and more behind the scenes that I don’t like. We’re filming more for the documentary tomorrow and I’m always nervous about what we might uncover.” Nik was working on a behind the scenes look at the fan convention scene and he was planning to expose some of the shady secrets he’d learned, but he also wanted to spotlight the positives too which came in the fan interaction with celebs and the friendships and community that developed from cons. 

“Just enjoy it and I’ll be waiting for you when you come home tomorrow night,” she replied. 

“At my place?” he asked hopefully. 

Gwen felt a smile on her lips. “Of course.” 

“I can’t wait,” he whispered. They spent another 5 minutes talking about everything and nothing and finally they said their I love yous and goodbyes. 

Afterwards, Gwen and Giles had another relaxing day together. That was until just before supper time when she decided to take a peek at the stupid gossip site again. “Those lying motherfuckers,” she spat, standing up angrily. “I didn’t hire anyone,” she hissed. “I didn’t call the fucking paps - they just showed up.” 

“What’s wrong?” Giles asked. 

“This,” she growled. “This is what’s wrong.” She plopped down beside him angrily and passed him her phone to read the latest. 

**Friday, January 17, 2020  
Blind Item #9**

**This foreign born B+ list mostly television actress is most well known for that now defunct pay cable series. Recently she has been in this space because of some indiscretions with a married co-star from that same show. So, what does she do? For the first time ever she called a pap to take her photo with her partner.**


	6. Chapter 6

By the time he had finished at the con, flew back to LA and drove to his house, it was very late. He could have flown back the next morning, but he really wanted to see Gwen before she was too busy getting ready for the SAG awards and they didn’t have a chance to be alone. He wasn’t surprised to find her asleep in his bed when he got home. Nik took a minute to look at her, really look at her, as she lay there sleeping peacefully. She was an angel and she made his heart race and flutter every single time he laid eyes on her. 

Nik stripped off his clothes and slipped into bed. He knew she would be sleeping in the nude just like she always did, so he slid over until his bare skin touched hers and laid his head on the same pillow. Her skin was warm and soft and his body soaked up the heat. Gwen stirred and sighed. “Hey, you’re home,” she mumbled sleepily. 

“Shh, just sleep,” he whispered soothingly. He stroked the outside of her thigh, where his hand was resting, with soft gentle caresses and she sighed. 

“I didn’t call the paps,” Gwen muttered. 

That made Nik laugh. Since the last gossip item came out she couldn’t let it go. “I believe you,” he whispered. Nik slipped his arm around her and snuggled in closer. It was the most wonderful feeling to hold her like that, so relaxing - until his body started making other plans. Gwen stretched her legs out and wiggled her ass against his groin. She wanted it. That knowledge and her squirming made him hard in no time. “You sure you’re not too tired?” he asked. Her confirmation consisted of her reaching a hand around their bodies to grope his ass. 

That was all the encouragement he needed to start exploring her body in more sensual ways. He toyed with a nipple, pinching it gently and rolling it until it grew hard and Gwen moaned. Then he moved lower and played with her pussy, teasing her with a light, lazy touch. When he couldn’t wait any longer he lifted her leg, adjusted his position and gently worked his way inside of her. When they were fully united he took a moment to really enjoy the feel of her body wrapped around his cock - tight, wet and warm. 

Gwen squirmed again and he sensed her impatience so he started to move, nice and slow with long, deep strokes. He loved the low, soft moans she made when he filled her up each time. Nik nuzzled her cheek and then placed light kisses along her jaw as he fucked her. It was relaxed, yet precise and sensual lovemaking with all the same effects of a more vigorous style. 

Eventually those soft moans got stronger and louder as he pushed her closer and closer to the edge. “I fucking love you,” he whispered in her as soon as he felt her body jerk. Nik put his hand on her pelvis to slow the writhing so he could continue to fuck her through her orgasm. She was so wet and slick on his shaft as he pushed deep, over and over again, through the pulsing contractions of her pussy. 

Nik tried to keep the slow pace, but the closer he got to his own orgasm the less control he had. By the time he came he had lifted her leg, shifted his weight and was pounding her. “Fuck,” he grunted as he finally released inside her. Nik sighed happily, sinking back down to their original spooning position. 

“I’m glad you’re home,” she sighed, hugging his arm around her midsection. 

“Me too,” he replied, wiggling into a final comfortable position to sleep with his cock growing soft, still inside her. All the crap they’d been facing lately felt insignificant when he held her like that - it was the two of them, happy and in love - and that’s exactly what they deserved. 

Before Gwen left the next day, late in the morning, they had a conversation about the awards and how they should act. They decided it was best to avoid taking photos together if possible, so Nik said he would show up near the end of the red carpet to make sure the photographers didn’t try to get them to pose together. Gwen also thought it might be best if they didn’t sit beside each other, but Nik shut that shit down. “If I have to suffer through a boring award show I’m not doing it without you by my side.” There were times in the past he had actually rearranged the seating to make sure they were side by side and he would do it again when they got there if she was anywhere but right beside him. 

They managed to get through the awards and the after party without anyone getting a photo of the two of them together, yet they were still able to chat like they always did and enjoy the night with some amazing cast mates they hadn’t seen in a while. Once they rolled up to Chateau Marmont in the wee hours of the morning Nik was quite drunk, but none of them were ready to end the amazing night they were having. They all partied a little longer and most of them ended up staying at the hotel where Gwen and Giles had been staying all along. 

Nik hadn’t planned on having Gwen in his bed that night, but that’s exactly where she ended up once everyone else called it a night. The sex wasn’t anything like the night before - it was wild and quite kinky with the alcohol removing all their inhibitions. He fucked her mouth, her pussy and her ass before she tied his wrists and ankles and sat on his face until he made her come with his tongue. She finished him off reverse cowboy before they both collapsed and slept until the next afternoon. 

“Please tell me you’re not looking at that gossip site,” Nik groaned, when he woke and saw Gwen was on her phone. She gave him a sad look. “No way. Already? But we were so fucking careful last night - it’s clearly bullshit.” Nik rolled onto his back and sighed. “Why won’t he leave us alone?” He licked his lips. “How bad is it this time?” 

Gwen read him the latest installment, “The three named foreign born A-/B+ list actor who has frequently been in this space as of late, didn’t take his wife as his date last night. Apparently she didn’t want to be at the same table as the co-star he has been seeing/ was seeing. It would have all been very awkward.” 

Nik tried to look on the bright side. “Well, that one part sounds like past tense for starters and it’s clear, just like in the others, that they don’t have any real information - they’re just fishing.” 

“Nik, this is bad,” Gwen said softly. “Everytime we try to make it better it just keeps building. We laid low last night and still we end up with another blind about us. I can’t even imagine how bad it would have been if we were ourselves.” 

“It’s going to blow over,” he said, reaching out to stroke her leg. He wasn’t sure he believed what he was saying but he wanted to make Gwen feel better. 

“Have you talked to Nukaka at all? What does she think of all of this?” Gwen asked. 

“Uh,” he gave her a sheepish look. “I haven’t talked to her in over a week. She called the other day and by the time I got the message it was too late to call back. Then I guess I just forgot.” He saw her look of disapproval and he understood. The four of them were in this together and he should have been communicating with Nukaka. “What does Giles think?” Nik asked, quite certain they had talked. 

Gwen rubbed her face with her hands, rolled her neck and sighed. She was stalling with her answer and he suspected that meant it was going to be something he wouldn’t like. “We have discussed things,” she began. Then she paused again and tapped her fingers on the nightstand for a moment. 

“What’s wrong?” he asked, feeling nervous of what she had to say. Nik sat up and propped a couple of pillows behind himself. “Just tell me,” he added. 

“We had a conversation the other day,” Gwen said gently, looking over at him. She reached over and took his hand and held it. “Giles made some really good points and I’ve been waiting to discuss them with you. I wanted to get through the SAG awards first. I wanted us to both enjoy the night without anything too heavy weighing on our minds.” 

“You’re scaring me here,” Nik admitting, gripping her hand a bit tighter. “You’re not - we’re not - I mean, you don’t want to, uh, end things? Break up?” he stammered. 

“Oh my God, no,” she replied, shaking her head. “Of course not, why would you ever think that?” 

“I guess I’m a worst case scenario kind of guy,” he said with a shrug. The feeling of relief was incredible, but short lived. 

Gwen’s eyes turned sad again. “I’m not even sure if that is the worst case,” she whispered. 

“Gwen, what the fuck?” he snapped. “What are you talking about? Tell me what’s going on - please?” His heart was beating like crazy and he felt like he couldn’t catch his breath. 

“Can we please go back to your place first?” she asked. “I don’t want to have this conversation here.”

Nik sighed. He didn’t want to wait, but he did appreciate that she wouldn’t want to have a deep, likely painful, conversation in a hotel room. They would have to leave the room eventually and it could be hard to hide their mood from anyone they might run into. “I’ll shower here and head home. Meet me there as soon as you can get there.” 

“I won’t be long,” she promised. Gwen leaned over and kissed him warmly, then took his face in her hands. “I know you’re scared, but just remember how much I love you - everything will be okay. We will get through this together.” Nik leaned his forehead on hers and prayed she was right.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welllll this was only supposed to be 3 or 4 chapters, but 7 chapters later we are finally done. There haven’t been any new developments in the last few days on the gossip site and, not surprisingly, it seems that Nik and Gwen have gone into hiding 😂 So here is the final instalment to wrap this one up. 
> 
> All the blinds in the fic so far have been real with the exception of this final one at the end. It’s completely made up :) 
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading and for all the incredibly kind comments and discussion along the way. I hope you enjoy this ending and I hope it’s been a fun ride for you all like it has for me ❤️❤️❤️

“So when Giles and I were talking he was concerned that with all this attention and gossip all over social media there’s a good chance Safina and Filippa might come across it,” Gwen said softly. They were sitting in the living room, side by side after heading back to his place separately from the hotel. “The very thing we have been trying to avoid all these years.” 

Nik took a deep breath, trying to calm his nerves, but it didn’t help at all. “So we tell them it’s just gossip and to ignore it.” 

“Nik, come on,” she said, giving him a look. “They are smart girls and they’re older now. They aren’t going to just buy that and let it go. We both know it.” 

“I don’t want to think about this, I can’t,” he muttered, feeling completely overwhelmed all of a sudden. This wasn’t how it was supposed to happen. They had controlled this thing for years and years, now all of a sudden it was out of their hands and he didn’t know how to deal with that. He stood up and started to pace. “So what do we do?” he asked, walking back and forth across the room briskly. 

“I think maybe it’s time,” Gwen said gently. “I think it’s time for this to all come to an end.” 

Nik started shaking his head. “No,” he said. “Not like this - it’s not time. They’re not ready. They’re still just kids.”

“Oh Sweetheart,” she said sadly, standing up to join him. “I know they still seem like your little girls - they always will. They’re your babies and that will never change even when they are grown with children of their own.” Gwen grabbed his hand and stopped his ability to pace. He resisted the urge to pull away and allowed her to hold him back. “But they are both teenagers now. Filippa is officially an adult. Safina isn’t far behind her and she’s wise beyond her years.” 

Nik felt his eyes sting. He didn’t want to cry so he fought off the emotions he was feeling. “I need to think about this,” he blurted out. “I need to go walk or run or something - just clear my head a bit and try to sort this mess out.” His latest emotion was anger. They had tried so hard. They had done everything right and it still wasn’t enough. 

“Hey,” Gwen said, tugging his hand until he looked at her. She leaned over and kissed his cheek. “Everything is going to be okay,” she whispered. “Go walk. Think this through and I’ll be here when you’re ready to talk some more.” 

Nik turned and was about to walk away, but something made him stop. He was still holding her hand so this time when he shifted to face her again he tugged her to him and attacked her mouth with a passionate and possessive kiss. He needed a reminder of exactly what he was fighting for. Gwen owned a piece of his heart, just like both of his daughters and he needed all three of them in his life if his heart was going to remain whole. “I’ll be back soon,” he said after releasing her. 

‘Soon’ turned out to be a full two hours of aimless wandering around his neighborhood. He jogged a bit initially to just shake it all off and start fresh, then he started walking and let his mind explore all the pros and cons he could think of. When he still wasn’t getting anywhere he pulled his phone out of his pocket and opened up Instagram. 

He started looking through Filippa’s page first. His first born was a lot like him - a bit goofy with a big heart. Anyone who met her loved her right away and he really had no worries for her future. She would set her mind to something and she would follow through. Her current focus was on getting healthier and in shape. She was committed to her training and enjoying it. He often watched her videos from the gym and he was really proud of her effort and focus. 

The last photo she had posted was a family picture from Christmas time. They looked like a perfect little family - yet it was all a lie and had been for some time. It wasn’t that they weren’t all happy, because they were - it just didn’t take the shape of a traditional family like the girls believed it was. As he scrolled back further he saw lots of photos from her time in LA with her boyfriend and that was a reminder that she really was growing up into an independent woman. 

He switched over to Safina’s page - his baby. She was more of a free spirit than her sister, yet of the two of them, if he was being completely honest, she was the one he had to worry about less. Safi would find her way in this world and she would do it with that beautiful smile and oodles of wit and charm. She was currently on a ski trip with friends and she looked deliriously happy and carefree in every photo she posted. 

In his mind he had put parameters on this charade and he figured when they were both over 18 was when it would be time. But what he hadn’t realized back then was that age is just a number. While Filippa might not have been mature enough to deal with the truth at 15 or 16 - Safina was. He could look at her mischievous little eyes and he knew she was strong enough to accept the truth. 

By the time he was headed back to the house he knew that Gwen was right. They couldn’t allow the girls to learn the truth this way. It needed to come from the two people who loved them the most. Even though they wouldn’t be completely honest he was comfortable with not disclosing the full truth to protect them. He didn’t want them to think back and wonder if the last several years were genuine - because they absolutely were. Nukaka and him were completely on the same page when it came to their daughters. They agreed from day one that when it came time to end the ruse they would make it seem like they had decided to break up recently. 

“Gwen?” He called when he walked back inside the house. 

“I’m in the kitchen,” he heard her call out. When he entered he found her taking a batch of brownies out of the oven - his favorite. “Thought maybe you could use a little comfort food,” she said with a shrug. Nik was extremely appreciative, not just because of how thoughtful she was being but because he also knew she was not a fan of baking or cooking at all. 

“Thank you,” he replied, heading right over to the pan. 

“Uh, shouldn’t you let them cool?” She asked. 

“It can cool on my plate,” Nik said, dishing himself a huge chunk. He grabbed a fork and they both sat at the table. 

“You seem like you’re in better spirits,” Gwen said hesitantly. “Did the walk help?” 

He nodded as he shoved a steaming bite of brownie in his mouth. It was way too hot but he shifted it around and blew out some stream until it was manageable and then chewed and swallowed. “This is fucking amazing,” he mumbled, digging in for another bite before he finally got back to the conversation at hand. “I decided you’re right. It’s time we do this before it all explodes completely and we have a huge mess on our hands.” 

“You’re sure?” She asked, looking a bit skeptical that he could change his mind in a couple of hours. Nik nodded and explained his thought process and how he’d been going through their social media accounts. “Do you think Nukaka will agree?” Gwen wondered out loud. 

Nik nodded. “Right from day one she always left this thing in my hands,” he admitted. “I know she wants to protect the girls and I know she’s dependant on me still, so that will be hard, but she’ll agree. I’m sure of it.” 

“So I guess the next question is when?” Gwen asked. 

“I thought about that some too,” he replied, bobbing his head. “When we tell the girls Nukaka and I will have to do it together, obviously, but once it’s out you and I will have to be more careful than ever and it’s going to mean a lot of time apart, more than normal.” Gwen looked as sad about that as he felt, but he could tell she understood and agreed. “I want my fill of you before that happens,” he whispered, as he reached across the table to caress her fingers. “A few more days here and I’ll come to London for a few days too,” he said softly. “I know it won’t feel like enough, but I just want to be around you. We can lay low. Hide out. Stay off social media. Just you and me - together, happy, getting a taste of what our future will be like one day very soon - except for the laying low part,” he added. Nik smiled at her. “Once we are official I plan on making up for all the time we’ve had to hide our feelings in public.” 

“I don’t do PDA,” she teased. 

“Yeah we’ll see about that,” he laughed. Nik finished the last bite of his brownie and swallowed. “Come on, let’s go lay on the couch and plan our future.” 

Gwen looked so happy she was going to cry and he understood completely. Telling his daughters that their parents are getting a divorce would be the hardest thing he’d ever had to do in his life, but once that was over he finally had a real, open and honest future with Gwen to look forward to. It wouldn’t be long until Safina and Filippa went out on their own and forged their own path in the world. He wanted to watch that happen with the woman of his dreams by his side. 

They curled up on the couch together and spent the rest of the night talking, laughing, and of course arguing about what their future would hold. Where they would live, how many houses they would own, how much each of their parents would love the other and so on. They also made a pact that once they were official, they would never spend more than two weeks apart no matter where their work took them. 

Nik knew his world was about to change but he was certain it would only get better. Later that evening he told her how much he loved her and spent hours worshipping every part of her body from head to toe. They made love in a deep and emotional way that felt different because they finally knew what their future held. 

A few difficult and challenging weeks down the road there was one more blind item about them on Crazy Days and Nights. They both saw it and the reveal that came a short time later, but neither one of them gave a fuck. They were finally free to live the life they wanted and no asshole gossip writer was going to ruin that for them any longer. 

**Blind Item Revealed #5**

**You may have heard the recent news that this foreign born three named A-/B+ actor split with his wife of over 20 years. In a few months you’ll hear he’s now dating his costar from that hit cable series that ended last year. What they won’t tell you is that they have been having a secret affair for almost half the actor’s marriage. You heard it here first.**   
**_Nikolaj Coster-Waldau/Gwendoline Christie_ **


End file.
